There’s a cool sounding exhibit coming to SF’s Dogpatch titled “No F#@*ing Way! Selling America on the Bus“.

Someone who works at SF Muni just sent me a link. The event looks worthwhile. The theme is that artists, marketers, and transit geeks can get all together and create some new ways to feel about buses. Perhaps one of the outcomes will be a few clever ideas to revolutionize urban bus systems. Who knows?

Here are two suggestions:

1.) Create a free public bus system. Fund the service by taxing every car owner in the city. The system would be free for residents who apply for a pass. The service would require all others to pay $0.50 per ride.

2.) Create a luxury bus system. Design the system to specifically address the needs and interests of SF’s middle and upper middle classes. This bus service would exist somewhere between the present bus system and the taxi system. Make it sexy. Make it a social scene. Tie it into some type of online community. Make it expensive, convenient, and comfortable enough to be perceived and desired as a luxury. Fund the system by increasing the rental rate on public street parking, since we all know that public streets are a precious and undervalued commodity. Fares would be paid with some type of smart card; a really smart card, one that would even allow people to run a small short term interest free debt (up to $12.00 or so), and easily recharge their credits via their mobile device of choice. Include late night service and greatly expanded Golden Gate/Bay Bridge routes. Also offer airport routes at prices higher than the independent commercial shuttles, and lower than taxis.

See you in the bike lane.